


i miss him, phil

by testimatesouls



Category: Minecraft (Video Game)
Genre: Betrayal, Dream Team SMP Angst (Video Blogging RPF), Dream Team SMP Spoilers, Post-Betrayal, Post-Manberg-Pogtopia War on Dream Team SMP (Video Blogging RPF)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-20
Updated: 2021-01-20
Packaged: 2021-03-12 05:21:42
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,352
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28880160
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/testimatesouls/pseuds/testimatesouls
Summary: "did i fuck up phil?""what? what do you mean?""did i say something to tommy? am i the reason why he betrayed us? was what i gave him not enough?" techno's voice was shaky. his god forsaken emotions were slowly coming out and he was losing his grip of them."no, tech. he did what he thought was right. you treated him the best you could. he followed his heart and instinct. you had no part in it.""you're the only one that stays, phil."
Relationships: Technoblade & Phil Watson (Video Blogging RPF)
Kudos: 50
Collections: This collection includes works relating to Minecraft- Dream Smp.





	i miss him, phil

_ “what the fuck do you mean you choose tubbo?! the ones who betrayed you? you’re going back to them? after everything i’ve done for you? i put that armour on your back. i got netherite for you. i gave you those weapons. i trusted you with my axe that i slaved to make! i considered you a friend tommy. i considered you someone i could trust.” _

_ “techno, i’m sorry-” _

_ “when i said you didn’t have to join while i blew up l’manberg, that didn’t fucking mean you team with the enemy side! you could’ve just sat on the sidelines tommy! you could’ve! i trusted you! you aren’t worthy of my axe. give it back." _

_ “i think i AM worthy you ungrateful bitch. you tried to destroy my home!" _

_ “i said, give it BACK.” _

\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

technoblade woke up with his head pounding. groaning, he turned to face the other side of his bed, murmuring, “holy shit.” he felt dizzy. he’d woken up with a recurring morning sickness that he couldn’t put his finger on. it occured back when wilbur died as well. techno slowly tried to get up, propping himself against the frame of the bed phil built for him. the pajamas techno made lazily out of sheep’s wool fell down his legs as he sat up. he’s not one for sewing. phil offered to do it for him that day since he got his measurements horribly wrong, but technoblade declined since they’re “just a little big and will do the job”.

he rubbed his temples in discomfort, trying to soothe the soreness in his head but it persisted. it felt like his brain was swelling and throbbing, trying to escape out of his skull. techno tried to distract himself by looking for phil, but he wasn’t in his bed, and usually gets up later in the morning, so technoblade assumed he slept in, which wasn’t typical of him unless he was unwell. 

thoughts of tommy couldn’t help but bother him, it’d already been a week since the kid left for the one country that betrayed and exiled him out of their ranks. techno couldn’t believe tommy’d left so easily and doing so in front of everyone else in the nation too. the piglin felt stuck in his head and didn’t want to make himself feel more sick, so he slowly managed himself off the bed and headed for the stairs. 

his head spun as he managed himself down, and he almost snagged his hoof against the pajama leg dragging behind him.

“good morning, sleepy head,” technoblade heard. it was phil. he was sitting with edward by the fireplace while reading a book. the book had been put down when he noticed techno awoke to come down, and phil gave techno the usual warm smile the ex-winged always had.

“hey..” techno paused, bracing at the thumping from his head, “phil.’

“woah, there. slow down,” phil said, standing up and reaching for techno to help find him a seat. "you're looking unusually wea- err, drained. what's wrong mate? feeling sick again?"

"i mean, i guess so yeah. it's not really bothering me as much it used to. i've grown accustomed to it."

phil headed towards the brewing stands as his son talked, grabbing glistering melon and teabags out of the brewing chest on his way. he left water to boil as he spoke, "then what  _ is _ bothering you?" techno sat in silence as a response. he wasn't one for opening up, even if it was phil sometimes. techno couldn't help but feel embarrassed for missing tommy. the piglin was supposed to be strong willed, able to not let anything get to him. but that really wasn't the case. losing family had always fucked him up. especially when they'd betrayed you after you trusted them a second time. family was the most important thing in technoblade's life and he would give up anything for it in a heartbeat. it hurt when that same mindset wasn't reciprocated. but you can't expect perfection, or anything from anyone really. he could only trust phil now.

phil stared at techno in the silence. he wasn't going to force the other to talk, phil let it be for a moment and threw away the teabag that sat in a clay cup now full of healing tea. "drink this, it's healing tea. i used your favourite orchid tea bags since you like them and they're beneficial for your health anyway," techno murmured a 'thank-you' in return as he brought the drink to his lips. drinking the tea in quiet gave techno a regrettable time to think. an accidental tear slipped while he drank. he hoped the cup would cover his eyes, but when phil's hand gently landed on techno's shoulder, he assumed it came to no avail. the touch made techno flinch for a moment. he set the cup down and stared at phil, still a single tear finding a nesting place in his fur.

the ex-winged could usually tell when something was wronged with techno. it wasn't anything magical or that 'special bond where you just know', phil had just spent so much time with techno that he memorized the piglins body language. phil kneeled in front of the chair techno sat in, sliding his human hand down to the calloused, furry one of the others, "take your time mate. i'm not going to force you to talk. i know you don't like opening up. you are not weak. take your time." technoblade teared up more in response. he always fell apart when phil showed patience and kindness to him without fail.

"did i fuck up phil?"

"what? what do you mean?"

"did i say something to tommy? am i the reason why he betrayed us? was what i gave him not enough?" techno's voice was shaky. his god forsaken emotions were slowly coming out and he was losing his grip of them.

"no, tech. he did what he thought was right. you treated him the best you could. he followed his heart and instinct. you had no part in it."

"you're the only one that stays, phil. wilbur went insane and tommy left. family is losing its meaning. you're the only one i have. the only one i can trust. i'm so angry that i let myself be vulnerable to tommy. that was such a fucking mistake."

technoblade started to cry. more than he'd cried in a long while, and it's been a long while since he cried at all. it always seemed to be family and the ones he'd let in that broke him. the ones closest that decided to leave far away. he gave up on keeping his composure and let loose. he fell into himself and phil had to raise himself up to support techno's body. "i hate to say it but i miss him phil. i miss the brat."

phil wrapped his arms around techno and in spirit wrapped his wings around him like he used to do when the kids were young. phil had one hand in technos hair and the other on his back. phil let a thumb trail around the others back as techno wailed. the ex-winged whispered affirmations, trying to calm his son down, "it's okay. i'm going to be staying right here no matter who comes and goes. i'm right here tech. crying doesn't make you weak, you're okay." tears had started to soak through phil's robe, but he didn't show a care for it. he was proud of techno for letting his emotions out. phil kept a tight grip, repeating the same routine he had done when his son was small. techno always found comfort in the nostalgia of when he was a child. it made him feel safe and unburdened like he felt when he was younger.

techno couldn't say anything in response beside "i miss him" and "i fucked up" over and over. dad was always there for him. though still sad and gripping onto phil like the world was ending, techno's sobs became quieter and more controlled.

"i love you. thank you."

"i love you too tech."

**Author's Note:**

> haven't written in a long time, hopefully i'm not too rusty in the angst department


End file.
